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Posted: Mon Mar 06, 2006 9:48 pm

Chard: FIRE at will!
Bromhead : Errrr.....! Chard old chap, which one's Will?

Posted: Mon Mar 06, 2006 10:19 pm

Chard: Independent, Fire at Will!

Bromhead: Sorry old boy I subscribe to the Times... by the way who's this Will fellow?

Posted: Tue Mar 07, 2006 5:02 am

..."Wales and the All Blacks..." - now why didn't I think of that one?

Anyway I can't let you guys have all the fun.

Chard:
"I say, Gonny, the camp at Isandlwana has been wiped out by more that 20 000 Zulus, Lord Chelmsford is out in Mangeni valley with the 2/24th and he won't be back until tomorrow morning. In the meantime, we've got 4000 Zulus heading our way and there's only 150 of us and a few biscuit boxes. What are we going to do?"

Bromhead:
"That's all very well, Chard, old boy, but what's your primary source for that statement?"

Dawn

Posted: Tue Mar 07, 2006 8:05 pm

"Do you fancy a cup of tea Gonny".

"Yes please. I asked the QM for a biscuit earlier but he said every single box had disappeared from the stores!".

Posted: Tue Mar 07, 2006 8:46 pm

oh boy would love to see what Johnny Cleese would write on this one!...

Posted: Tue Mar 07, 2006 10:19 pm

I know it's old but.
Chard "good job we have red tunics, we do not want the sight of blood to upset the men"
Gonville "yes, just a pity they did not issue us with brown trousers"

Posted: Tue Mar 07, 2006 11:55 pm

And a more contemporary mix;

Chard; 'Take care of dear Spot for me, Gonny...(and, faintly)....Kiss me Gonny'

Bromhead; 'Over my dead body, Old Boy'....'I aint no queer cowboy'

Posted: Wed Mar 08, 2006 2:05 am

Hi Rich,

John Cleese version coming up...

Posted: Wed Mar 08, 2006 2:08 pm

Bromhead (looking through binoculars) - Chard. There are thousands of Zulus on that hill holding up numbers.

Chard - Numbers ?!

Bromhead - Yes. They're giving our men marks out of ten for their performance at Isandlwana this morning !

Posted: Thu Mar 09, 2006 7:51 pm

Bromhead: "You know, right now, I wish I was a damned ranker like Hook"

Chard: "Steady old boy, he's only acting like that for the film"

Bromhead (Shouts): "Here they come. Black as Hell and Thick as Grass"

Chard (Shouts): "Weekend pass for anybody who spots the one wearing the watch"

Posted: Fri Mar 10, 2006 8:14 am

Chard: Is that Edward Bear I see amongst those Zulus?

Bromhead: Yes, I do believe you're right. You can always depend on him to drop in when you least expect him and stir things up.

Dawn

(Newer members may have to look at Edward Bear's postings to understand that one.)

Posted: Fri Mar 10, 2006 9:03 am

Chard: "Better fetch the biscuit boxes Bromhead"

Bromhead: "Certainly old chap. Bourbons or Custard Creams?

Posted: Fri Mar 10, 2006 9:16 am

Chard: "Why the long face Bromhead? Spalding assured me nothing will happen"

Bromhead: "Think you'd better take a seat old boy........"

Posted: Fri Mar 10, 2006 7:10 pm

Chard I say old boy, Our chaps are singing Men of Harlech but I don't recognise that Zulu tune?

Bromhead I think I do. Isn't it a cover version off a German tribe in that "Gladiator" moving picture show?

Posted: Fri Mar 10, 2006 7:33 pm

COOK: this gentleman told me to pour the soup on the fire.
Bromhead: he did ?
Chard: no need to make a present of fire to the zulu.
Bromhead: yes well get on with it man.
COOK: but am i to take a trifle too sir ?
Chard: dammit man its a bit early for dessert.